When She Cries
by Savy
Summary: Songfic! DMxHS! R&R!


When She Cries   
  
Okay, I don't own Gundam Wing..I don't own the song. People in Japan own Gundam Wing, Restless Heart owns 'When She Cries'.   
  
  
**The road I have travelled on  
Is paved with good intentions**  
  
Duo leaned heavily against the cold steel wall of the elevator. It had been nearly a month since he had seen _her_. The Preventers had needed him. He smirked. Ha, needed him, the retired Gundam Pilot. The elevator chimed and the doors slid open. He stepped out and began to walk down the dark hall.   
  
He often wondered why it was that whenever a suicidal looking mission came up, it was always the Gundam Pilots who took them. He hated leaving her. He even hated telling her he was leaving. He only went on the missions to keep the peace. He had seen too much death, too much war.   
  
**It's littered with broken dreams  
That never quite came true**  
  
The God of Death. Shigami. No child ever walked up to his parents and proclaimed he wanted to a killer of masses, a destroyer, a taker of life. He never wanted to kill, it just happened. He fingered the silver cross that hung around his neck. No, he had never wanted to kill.  
  
**When all of my hopes were dying   
Her love kept me trying**  
  
~*~ FLASHBACK ~*~   
  
He held the gun in his hand. Slowly he turned it over, examining all its details. He held it up to his head and looked in the mirror. His eyes haunted him. He remembered them being full of life, laughing and joking. Now they were dead. Dead and gone. No spark of life remained in them. What he saw he did not like. He saw Heero's eyes,he did not want to turn into Heero. He would stop the transformation, even if he had to do something drastic.   
  
"Duo?" her soft voice came as the door creaked open. He watched her in the mirror. When she noticed him her face turned to pure shock, "Duo?!" He made a motion. "Stay back."  
She slipped into the room. "Duo?" she said again, this time her voice softer and calmer. "What are you doing?"  
He felt his heart leap at the sight of her. Her shoulder-length hair framed her face. She was dressed simply, but he still thought she looked beautiful. The dark blue jeans she wore made her legs look long and slim. The ribbed white tanktop she wore made her tan skin look even darker. He watched as she slowly walked towards him. She wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her forhead on his back. "I love you." he heard her whisper softly. "I love you."  
He let the gun clatter to the floor. Turning around he looked into her eyes. To his suprise they were filled with unshed tears.   
"You.." he whispered, pulling her close to him. "Thank you..."  
After all, he really was too young to die. He was only 18.  
  
~*~ END FLASHBACK ~*~  
  
**She doesn't has to hide   
The pain that she's been through**   
  
He slid the key into the door. He could hear the locks unlocking. Moments later he pushed the door open and stepped into the dark apartment. Instantly he noticed the faint perfume in the air. It could only belong to one person, his girl. The exotic smell nearly overwhelmed him. Duo quickly turned the lights on. He heaved a sigh of dissapointment when he saw no one. She must be at her place.. he thought sadly,i How would she know that I would be back today? Easy, she can't and obviously doesn't.i  
  
He shrugged the heavy leather jacket off and let dropped in onto the couch's armrest. The annoying digital clock blinked in the kitchen. He could see its angry red numbers from here. 1:00 it blinked over and over. Then it changed, 1:01. "Might as well try and get some sleep.." Duo muttered walking to his bedroom. As he walked he discarded some of his heavy clothing. First his boots, then sweater, the once crisp white business shirt. When he reached his room all he had on was the white tank and his jeans.   
  
**When she cries at night   
And she doesn't think that I can hear her**  
  
Before he opened the door a muffled sobbing reached his ears. He reconized it at once. "Oh Hil.." he whispered, his hand resting on the doorknob, "You did know, didn't you?"  
  
**She tries to hide all the fears she feels inside**   
  
The next morning he woke to her gentle fingers on his face. He opened his violet eyes slowly. He grinned when he saw her smiling face and laughing blue eyes. "Now...ain't this a way ta wake up?" He said as he sat up. She chuckled from her spot beside him. "Of course.." he admitted, "I'd rather be in a bed...not the couch." He found he couldn't resist her any longer. He pulled her close to him and kissed her gently. "I missed you." he whispered, running his fingers through her hair.  
"I..." she began, her voice choked. "I was so worried and scar--" She cut herself off. "I'm glad your back Duo."  
  
**So I pray this time   
I can be the man that she deserves**   
  
He sighed. He didn't expect her to tell him anything, but he had hoped. He would always hope...  
  
**'Cause I die a little each time   
When she cries**   
  
Tears. They had so many meanings, so many different origins. Duo thought as he absentmindly took a bite of his hamburger. Yes, tears were mysterious things. It was odd, he decided, sometimes her tears made him want to die, yet other times he could not figure out why on Earth she was crying. He had seen her cry at a movie, when reading a book, at a friend's wedding...but the tears that killed him the most were the ones he never saw. The ones she cried at night, the ones she tried to hide from him. Those tears hurt him the most, those tears were the ones that nearly drove him mad.   
  
**She's always been there for me**  
  
~*~ FLASHBACK ~*~  
  
"DUO! DUO!!" He heard her scream. "NO!!" Her paniced face was the last thing he saw before his world went black.  
  
The next thing he remembered was waking up in a hospital bed. The unique combination of medicine, tears, and death never failed to make his skin crawl. He could feel the IV's in his arms, the stiches on his forehead. When he opened his eyes the room was out of focus. He blinked a few times, the room slowly began to come clear. The drab gray walls, the sparkling white tile floor, the head that rested near the foot of his bed....  
Duo smiled weakly at the sight. Hilde had pulled a chair as close to left side of the bed as she could. Her right arm supported her head while she held his hand in her other hand. He noticed how warm her hand was, how white it looked compared to his, and how small and delicate it seemed. He gave it a gentle squeeze, when her eyes slowly opened he smiled. "My angel.." he said hoarsly. "You never left me.."  
  
~*~ END FLASHBACK ~*~  
  
**Whenever I'm falling  
When nobody else believed**   
  
Duo walked down the street to a nearby park. He never would admit it, but he loved the park. The trees, flowers, green grass...they all reminded him of something he never had. A childhood. He loved watching the children play. He would watch them run back and forth, laughing and shouting. The young mothers with their babies intrested him. He saw such a love in their eyes. Whenever he would see a young mother his thoughts would drift to his own mother. Did she ever look at him like that? What did she look like? What was she like? Did she love his father? Was his father tall and think, like him?   
  
With a shake of his head Duo sat down on the nearest bench. Those thoughts would lead him to depression, he reminded himself. Remember, you always have someone who believes in you as long as you have Hilde. As long as she's there, someone will always love you.   
  
He often doubted himself and his abilities. Yet, he never let others know that. He hid the pain and sorrow behind a grinning face and laugh. He wore a mask, and he wore it well. It fooled everyone....everyone but Hilde. She was never fooled.   
  
**She'd be there by my side**  
  
With a sigh and a smile she would welcome him back. She did not ask why or where, but simply understood. She allowed him to cry, yell, scream, anything to get his true emotions out. He could not remember many times that she lost her mask in front of others. To this day he could only remember once. That had been when he was caught in the explosion, the last thing he remembered was her screams and the look of pure terror that was on her face.   
  
**I don't know how she takes it**  
  
He watched her excuse herself from dinner. The excuse of being tired, he knew the real reason. She wanted to be alone to cry. I don't know how she does this..  
  
She would go to her room and cry herself to sleep, again. He would leave to go to his apartment, he would worry about her the entire night. He always did.  
  
**Just once I like to make it  
Then the tears of joy  
Will fill her loving eyes**  
  
It was perfect. Beautiful, elegant and perfect. He thought he would never pay it off, but finally he had. Now he could give it to her, along with his heart and eternal love. The diamond sparkled on the gold band. The sunlight caught the sapphires on the sides of the diamond, causing their faint pale stars to stand out. It was the perfect engagment ring for her. It had the traditional diamond in the center, yet it held her favorite stones as well. Sapphires. He smiled to himself and closed the black velvet box.   
  
**When she cries at night   
And she doesn't think that I can hear her**  
  
Sobs. Muffled sobs. He cringed. Would they ever stop? He had let himself in, now he regreated it. He had wanted to surprise her; breakfast in bed, the whole nine yards. Instead of being greeted by smiles and kisses he was greeted by tears and sobs.   
  
**She tries to hide all the fears she feels inside**   
  
"Duo?!" She cried sitting up. He took in the scene with a sad heart. Her black hair was messed up, her blue eyes red and her face puffy from crying. He sat down on the corner of the bed, "Babe, tell me..what's wrong?" She crawled over to him, her plaid flannel pajama pants and navy blue t-shirt contrasted harshly with his clean blue jeans, white pressed business shirt and leather jacket. He pulled her into his arms, breathing in her sweet scent. He held her close, but gently.   
  
**So I pray this time   
I can be the man that she deserves**   
  
"After all you've done for me.." Duo whispered, stroking her hair, "Let me help you.."   
"Oh Duo.." she cried, resting her head on his shoulder. "I..I don't deserve you."  
"No, no. I don't deserve you." Duo protested. "I don't deserve you Angel." He entwined his fingers in hers and held her hand to his lips. "I don't deserve you."  
  
**'Cause I die a little each time   
When she cries**  
  
Slowly her tears stopped, as did her sobs. He began to rock her back and forth, holding her close to him the entire time. Duo chuckled a little, "You know what babe?"  
"Hm?" She asked, her voice soft and calm.  
"I love you."  
  
**So I pray this time  
can be the man that she deserves  
'Cause I die a little each time  
When she cries…**  
  
Duo gently slid her off his lap and onto the bed. She sat beside him, her legs dangling off the side of the bed. Reaching into his jacket pocket, Duo got off the bed and knelt down infront of her.   
"Hilde, I love you with all my heart and soul. I can't live without you. You are my Angel, and I don't know what I ever did to recieve that gift. You've always been by my side, through good and bad. Heck, I can't think of anyone else who would do that. No one. You've saved my life, my heart, and my soul. Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"  
He watched in amazment as tears filled her eyes and ran down her cheeks. Slowly he opened the velvet box and took the ring out. With a shaking hand he slid it onto her left ring finger. "Will you marry me?"  
"Yes!" She cried, sliding off the bed and into his arms. "I will marry you Duo Maxwell!"  
He pulled back and cupped her face in his hands. "Why the tears?" he asked, wiping them away with his thumbs.  
"Tears of joy." she managed to say, "Tears of joy."  
  
  
  
  
~*~ Well?? What did ya think?!?! Please review!! Please!!! Tell me what you liked, hated...anything!   



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